“Since I became a mother, every day I leave the office at 5:30 pm because we have dinner with the children,” Sheryl Sandberg, CEO of Facebook, recently admitted in one of her public appearances. At first glance, this quite innocent statement produced the effect of a bomb exploding in the Western world. Sheryl Sandberg, one of the most powerful women on the planet, with a fortune of over $ 500 million, and working almost half a day ?! And most importantly - publicly declares this! What example does she give to the rest?.. Most of all, childless and unmarried American careerists took up arms against Sandberg. Discrimination against unencumbered women in the workplace is a very fashionable topic in America today. According to a study by the Center for Innovation (one of the largest research centers in the US),43% of American women aged 33–47 and 77% of women aged 20–32 have no children. And at least two-thirds of these women complain that for the same money they have to work an order of magnitude more than their family colleagues, that the latter have a more flexible and convenient schedule and that the bosses, in turn, are much more loyal to employees with children. rarely burdening with extracurricular work.
I spoke to several working mothers, several bosses, and ambitious childless girls. Everything turned out to be not so simple. Take Lena, for example. She is 36 years old and holds a respectable position in a well-known international organization. Lena has no children and family. Most of her colleagues do. And the latter, according to her, are actively using this fact. “I have several colleagues who can easily get up and go home in the midst of an emergency,” complains Lena. - Excuse - the youngest son has a performance in kindergarten, or a parent meeting, or something has happened to the nanny. And I, in their opinion, can work even at night - no one is waiting for me at home. And some, - Lena adds with a grin, - use the presence of children as a bargaining chip in undercover intrigues - to knock out easier projects, additional bonuses or a raise in salary. Or give my job, which I killed the weekend for, as my result. By the way, men play such games more often”.
Sandberg is right - there are clear career benefits to women who are childless. “I really hope that none of my employees will get married this year, and even worse - will not go on maternity leave. I need them to give 100% to work,”- I hear these words from my husband for several years in a row. He runs the Moscow office of a small German company. A third of the employees there are girls, all unmarried. (Considering that business trips to this company happen at least once a week, I'm not really surprised why they have so little time for their personal life.) And my husband is not unique - many managers openly prefer to hire and assign more responsible projects for those who are not burdened with family. “I recently interviewed a girl for a job,” says Marina Zinovieva, Managing Partner at LegaLife Law Firm.“And right off the bat she told me that she had to go home every evening at five thirty in the evening. Because, I'm sorry, she has a family. Note that she was employed at a very high salary. Naturally, she didn't get a job. " According to Zinovieva, who herself spent three days on maternity leave - exactly as long as she was in the hospital - childless employees in her company as a whole really work harder. And, as a rule, they get promoted faster. “I put them on more complex projects because I know I can rely on them. They will not run home at six in the evening because the nanny or the child is ill. I have a child myself, and I know what it is like when children are sick. But I'm used to giving my all and expecting the same from others. "she was employed at a very high salary. Naturally, she didn't get a job. " According to Zinovieva, who herself spent three days on maternity leave - exactly as long as she was in the hospital - childless employees in her company as a whole really work harder. And, as a rule, they get promoted faster. “I put them on more complex projects because I know I can rely on them. They will not run home at six in the evening because the nanny or the child is ill. I have a child myself, and I know what it is like when children are sick. But I'm used to giving my all and expecting the same from others. "she was employed at a very high salary. Naturally, she didn't get a job. " According to Zinovieva, who herself spent three days on maternity leave - exactly as long as she was in the hospital - childless employees in her company as a whole really work harder. And, as a rule, they get promoted faster. “I put them on more complex projects because I know I can rely on them. They will not run home at six in the evening because the nanny or the child is ill. I have a child myself, and I know what it is like when children are sick. But I'm used to giving my all and expecting the same from others. "usually get promoted faster. “I put them on more complex projects because I know I can rely on them. They will not run home at six in the evening because the nanny or the child is ill. I have a child myself, and I know what it is like when children are sick. But I'm used to giving my all and expecting the same from others. "usually get promoted faster. “I put them on more complex projects because I know I can rely on them. They will not run home at six in the evening because the nanny or the child is ill. I have a child myself, and I know what it is like when children are sick. But I'm used to giving my all and expecting the same from others."
However, there are bosses who value family employees more - the latter know firsthand what time management is. “Those who have a family and children often do much more in less time because they value every minute,” says Galina, editor of a large news site. - I know this from myself - I have two children, I gave birth to my first at 22. And my unmarried colleagues can easily go to lunch for two hours and then five more times manage to go to the kitchen for tea and discuss psychological trainings for the tenth time, which they endlessly visit. These people are clearly in no hurry."
The last point is difficult to argue with: the number of hours spent in the office does not mean high efficiency. The main thing is not how much you work, but how. And to advance in the service, as experience shows and is confirmed by numerous studies, first of all, such qualities as initiative, communication skills, the ability to understand the system of relationships in a team, feel the current situation and adapt to it help. Those who curry favor with their superiors and "live" at work end up losing points just as quickly as those who try to manipulate - whether it be having children or a yoga class scheduled for the evening. By the way, many companies today are switching, if not to free (as in the same Facebook and Google), then to a much more flexible schedule.
Tip 1: know your rights (at least in theory)
According to the law (article 258 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation), working mothers of young (up to 1.5 years old) children are given 30-minute breaks for feeding at least every three hours. These breaks can be postponed to the beginning or end of the working day, as well as added to lunchtime.
Business trips and any overtime work (on weekends, late in the evening and at night, etc. - Article 259 of the Labor Code of the Russian Federation), women with children under the age of three (and single mothers - children under five) can only be assigned with their written consent. Accordingly, young mothers by law have the right to refuse a business trip.
Tip 2: Choose the Right Husband
Sheryl Sandberg has been married for a second time for ten years, her husband Dave is an entrepreneur, they have two children. Sandberg admits that if it were not for her husband, she would not have seen professional victories. “The only really important life decision on which your entire career will depend is who you choose as your partner,” she writes in her book. “Choose a man who is ready to be your partner, […] who likes smart, ambitious women - not in words, but in deeds, and is willing to share household chores with you. At the beginning of the novel, we all like to be ideal women - to endlessly cook food for a loved one and generally save him from household chores. Do not rush to break into a cake for him. The quality of marriage is laid precisely at the beginning of the relationship. Give slack now - when the children appear, you will have to do twice as much. "It seems that Sandberg does not really indulge her husband - he has exactly half of the household chores. But they both feel good about it. Sandberg also cites research that confirms that in families where husbands actively help around the house, there are fewer conflicts, couples have more sex, and women are less likely to be depressed. “When a woman is responsible for half of the household income and a man is responsible for half of the household responsibilities, the risk of divorce is halved,” she writes.“When a woman is responsible for half of the household income and a man is responsible for half of the household responsibilities, the risk of divorce is halved,” she writes.“When a woman is responsible for half of the household income and a man is responsible for half of the household responsibilities, the risk of divorce is halved,” she writes.
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