Who went on maternity leave without fear or doubt? Or at least without a sinking heart thought about the upcoming parenting? There are probably a few such fearless ones: waiting for a baby, preparing for childbirth, planning and the course of pregnancy is a difficult and exciting process. The expectant mother has to enter a new unknown world, where she will have to play a completely different, unusual role, and evaluate herself as a specialist who will "fall out of the cage" for a long time. How to go on maternity leave, enjoy the happiness of motherhood, return back to work and not go crazy, the mother of three children and business coach Maria Gital will tell.
The twenty-first century is worth grateful for the fact that marriage, family responsibilities and the birth of children have ceased to be a sword of Damocles over a woman's head, and from a heavy obligation that must be fulfilled as early as possible, have turned into a happy right. Now girls decide for themselves how and when to start a family and think about children. And, most importantly, do you want to touch on this issue at all? In a civilized society, for those who wish to become a mother, such a thing as a decree has long been invented - a holy time when a woman can prepare for the birth of a baby and then take care of him. In Russia, maternity leave is deservedly considered one of the longest in relation to the global practice and is supported not only by the state, but also by the employer. And so that this stage of life, including preparation, flow and exit from it,went smoothly, you just need to choose one and the options that intuitively suits you.
With the decree, as with the New Year - as you “meet”, you will spend it. This means that even at the stage of pregnancy planning, it is worthwhile to soberly assess your working position and think about how to live with the changes that will soon come. Ultimately, there are only three options, and each of them is beautiful in its own way.
Option 1 (for women who are workaholics who love their job)
Such ladies have invested a lot of effort and money in education and have been successfully building their careers for several years. They are afraid to drop out of the profession even for a day (let alone a year or two), to lose clients, to be on the periphery of life. And all because they adore their work and therefore are afraid to have children. They have a constant struggle between the desire to take place as a professional and as a mother. Parenting, often, loses or is postponed (read also: “It's time for motherhood: royal persons who gave birth after 35 years”).
What if this story is about you? Exhale and accept the fact that nothing bad will happen! In no case. The job isn't going anywhere, and neither is your status as a new mother: the decree will simply be an expansion of social boundaries. If you are a supporter of this option, feel free to work right up to the very birth, and then combine work and caring for the baby. I will say right away that it will be difficult, but you are no stranger to it. In order not to harm yourself and your child, put personal health first. As crazy as it sounds, you are the highest value, without which everything will lose its meaning. Sleep more, distribute the load so as not to exhaust yourself and integrate work into life, and not vice versa. At least for a month, but give yourself some rest and the opportunity to recover physically. Childbirth is a difficult process and after it you will need time to recover.
Second option (transitional)
It is about the fact that you can work, not really “hoping”, and calmly, when the time of childbirth comes, “hammer” at work and try on the role of a caring mother. This option, first of all, will give you confidence in the future and a sense of financial security. By choosing it, you will work through the fear of being left without financial support and work with a child in your arms. This option is frankly good, because you will have money, which means a strong secured rear, independence and a certain freedom. You will stay on top of the main things “on the market”, but at the same time you will be able to switch to another, your personal story in time, only about you and the baby.
In fact, it is similar to the first option, but easier and in the "light" mode. This approach is considered the most popular, and concerns those who will either definitely return to the sphere from which they went on maternity leave, or, on the contrary, are ready to radically change their course. Often, girls up to 25-30 years old get a job wherever they have to, then they become pregnant and already on maternity leave they realize that they want something else. They will sit, think and change their life to a radically opposite one. Fortunately, time and accumulated resources allow. So, here are some solid pluses.
The third option (also extreme, but the opposite of the first)
It is about a complete switch from work to pregnancy, and therefore the easiest and most enjoyable for a woman. Such a decree becomes a real miracle and one really does not want to return from it. And all because this time becomes special due to internal changes and the acceptance of the female true essence. You can not only immerse yourself in your inner world, but also truly enjoy the changes that nature itself has in store. A woman flourishes in such a decree and receives such a powerful charge of positive energy, inspiration and fulfillment that it radically changes her professional activity. She fully matures as a person and overestimates her whole life, becomes wiser, happier and, due to this, many times more productive and successful as a professional. Taking care of herself and the child, she redefines priorities,learns to plan and shows unprecedented creativity. It is after such a decree that brilliant startups are born, business goes uphill, and the vocation finds you. Babies give insights when they take advantage of the period that precedes childbirth.
By choosing this path, you will receive several bonuses at once. First: motherhood will be harmonious and conscious. A welcome and healthy baby will be born to a mother who is focused on him, which means she can give love and care to the fullest. Second bonus: the relationship with the husband will be strengthened. Allowing a man to take care of the family's welfare, you will open the way for him to success and the development of events conceived by nature - he will prove himself as a good protector, breadwinner and support for you and the child (read also: "Women who made a career for husbands") … Third bonus: you can be filled with love and complete your development as a person. Anxiety will go away, you will be able to understand how you want to see your life and what brings the greatest joy in work.
Many are afraid that if they sit at home for a long time, they will begin to degrade. To prevent this from happening, set yourself a deadline that will be completely uncritical for your career, but extremely important for communicating with your baby and accepting yourself in a new capacity. As an approximate period, you can take a year from the date of birth. During this time, the baby will grow up and will be ready to start socialization, and you will not "run wild". You will also have to pump your planning skills and learn to notice all areas of your life. Try to keep balance and write down everything that really matters in your planner. Prioritize and always act through your own desires. With regard to work, this will allow you to receive money for what you like, and not "plow" on the hated work, forgetting about your family. And in relation to the child, give him a happy calm mother,with whom it is interesting and who will love him and at the same time enjoy the current life.
Remember, whichever option you choose for yourself, the decision will be correct if, in making it, you will be guided by inner feelings, and not by a mythical sense of duty. Every woman will definitely become a wonderful mother and at the same time will be able to remain in demand and highly paid specialist if she prepares in time and finds her balance between love and work. Give yourself time, take care of your health, and never deprive yourself of the opportunity to think a little. Be happy!
Photo: Getty Images
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